I would get away from calling it the terrible twos. I really hate that expression because it just immediately stereotypes tots who are in that age range and it negates any possitive aspects of the child.
yes it can be a challenging time for parents, but it can also be a learning time for you and the child.
I know lots of love, patience, and consistency is important. Being consistent in your yes remaining yes, and your no remaining no when it comes to teaching. Being firm and standing your ground without being tyrants. Just letting him know what is and is not acceptable. Have eye contact with him too, do not talk to the back of his head. This advise can be carried on throughout your childrens lives. I still do it with my teenage son because then I know he got what I said and vice versa.
Also try diverting the attention of your son to something positive, rather than focusing on what he is doing wrong. And also ignoring certain things that he does. Pick and choose your battles. But don't allow him to rule the roost, so to speak.
Also praising when he is behaving in a manner that you like, tell him how you like it when he plays nicely with his toys, tell him how you love it when he smiles at you. Positive re-inforcement.
A son of a year + is intelligent and knows quite alot. He may very well be testing you at times, it probably seems that way. I wouldn't dismiss the intelligence of a one year old.
But also recognise the frustrations and the emotions that a little one goes through, when perhaps he doesn't have the verbal communication to express what he is feeling and what he wants and does not want.
So the tantrums and such is his only way to express.
So try and empathise with his dilemma aswell. It's like us as adults, not being able to pin point what we are wanting and what we are feeling, the frustration we may have not being able to do that.
Empathising and understanding does not mean giving in to your son. It just helps to know that it is a phase, it is a process, it isn't forever. Keep reminding yourselves of that.
But if you guys remain calm as much as you can, and set the tone within the home.
I am sure you will get through this period with a better understanding and respect for your child and his development.
I wish all three of you well. This time will go by quickly too, so cherish those wonderful lovely moments you have with your son.Any tips or advice for the terrible twos?
The best way to stop the terrible twos is to never allow them to behave terribly.
Don't snatch things from him that he can't have, it would make you mad if someone did that to you, instead tell him, ';No, not that, this'; and give him something else.
Its not a matter of yelling about what he can't do, but instead showing him what he can do.
Also, if he is being truly belligerent and headstrong, don't be afraid to give him a swat. He is old enough to understand ';no'; at this age.
Children are NOT born automatically knowing right from wrong - this MUST be taught to them. The sooner you set rules, punish and educate - the easier it is for a child.
Do NOT allow your child to be the 'boss' - YOU are the parent and boss!!!
Children will throw tantrums because they do NOT know they are NOT supposed to do this! Step up to the plate and be a great parent and your 'sweet boy' will behave the way you want him to behave.
It's hard to deal with that age. My advice to you is to stay in control. Show him that you are the boss and no matter how much he tries, he will not break you. Eventually he will realize that you are the boss and will not give in.
When I go to wal mart with my kids and we go to the toy section if they see something they want they say ';can I have that NEXT time?'; They do not scream and throw fits because they learned early that it would not work. (and next time rarely comes;)
My son is 26 months...a little older,but his started younger...and have kind of taperd off now. The reason they do this is because they are starting to become there own person....and want to show you. My son would scream,bang his head on the wall, throw tantrums, hit, even bite some times. The only thing we found was helpful...was to ignore him...i know that sounds mean..but thats all they want is attention. once he realized what he was doing didnt get him anyting...he stopped. not to say that he still didnt throw tantrums..but it helped stop it quickly...honestly though...this is probably something your just gonna have to ride out.:(
Valium, klonopin, or ativan...for yourself. Then so far as the kid, well if you want the ';hip mommy'; seal of approval, you just let him continue on being bad and call it ';he's expressing himself';. That's how they do it these days.
Just enjoy them, it won't be long until they are teenagers and then you will wish they were two again!
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